Team 2E4 : Football Lives

Saturday, May 31, 2008

31st May Football Report

enter code: GQIII.Y2J

Players: Alvin Yeo; Farhan Daud; Farhan Yazid; Ming; Vimallan; HongQin; Samuel; Guo Qiang

Top GoalScorers Today:

Vimallan (8 goals)
Alvin Yeo (6 goals)
Farhan Yazid (5 goals)
Farhan Daud (5 goals)

If Vimallan can top the goalscoring charts again, better than Samuel and both the Farhans, then he is not a junior anymore. Should we abolish the 'Junior' rule??

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Can You FIFA? - 2E4 Style (Week 4)

Is it you being featured today?! If not, it could be you next week! All statistics are confirmed by official Actim Index of the Barclays Premier League. Idea adopted from 'Can You FIFA08' and published by Actim Index. Players' faces are created with FIFA06.

Vimal 'VimaLampard'
17 Years Old
Striker

Most famous for his unorthodox 'Eagle Strike' ball control.
Produce alot of emo posts in his blog.

Lets face it, the only person Vimal can dribble past is Samuel, thus making his dribbling stats very low. His unique ball control is inspired from an eagle, spreading both his arms wide and lifting one leg in the air to 'expertly' control the ball.

Vimal's got pace in his game, he would chase after every loose ball. And recently, he showed that he can score goals without fancy dribbles and stepovers. Maybe, in the future, the team might even drop the 'Junior Rule'.

Saturday, May 24, 2008

24th May Football Report

enter code : GQIII.Y2J

Players: Nash; Farhan Yazid; Ariff; Ming; HongQin; Guo Qiang

Today, before the football match started, an overly excited streaker ran out onto the court and bared it all.

He started to strip and pole-danced at the goalpost, shocking everyone who was in the vicinity. Photographers managed to catch some pictures of the streaker in action.

The court stewards and marshalls managed to haul him off the court before the obscene streaker took off his pants.

The whole obscenity lasted for 30 minutes before any players arrived.

But some poor souls who arrived early witnessed this disturbing incident. One witness was Guo Qiang. He said:

"I was really unlucky to witness such scene, he was screaming and swinging his hips about and dancing crudely at the goalpost. I was close to vomiting."

Police later confirmed that the streaker is identified as Samuel Choo Yong Chye. He will be jailed 6 months and fined USD1000.00 and banned from attending football games for life.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Can You FIFA? - 2E4 Style (Week 3)

Ah Ming
17 Years Old
Goalkeeper/Striker

Ability to jump high to make superb saves.
Listens to metal music all day.

Ming is the first choice goalkeeper and he has this ability to save airbourne shots. He has this goalkeeper instinct which allows him to be at the right position at the right time. Afterall, Ming was personally trained by your Inspirational Captain of Excellence.

Ming recently always comes out to be some sort of attacking midfielder. Once, he even scored 6 goals, better than Farhan Daud. He also comes back to help defend, better than Samuel.

Monday, May 19, 2008

19th May Football Report (Vesak Day)

enter code : GQIII.Y2J

Players: Suhaili; RenJin; Qing Huang; HongQin; Farhan Yazid; Samuel; Ming; Guo Qiang.

The Impenetrable Defense Which GQIII.Y2J Created

Lucky for us, Farhan Yazid called Suhaili to come play with us after so many years.

Suhaili is like a very effective footballing machine but is easily broken down because he has hardly any stamina in him! I wonder how he can manage those tough nights with his wife in the future..

There was a team who came to challenge us but due to extreme fatigue from most of our players who played 2 days ago, we lost every game to that team.

Can You Smell What Ah Ming Is Smelling?? His Armpit?

And there was an incident where Guo Qiang lost his cool after RenJin tossed his bag which contained his handphone to the ground. For more on why Guo Qiang lost his cool, visit his blog.

After the incident, Guo Qiang apparently opened a media conference and publicly appologised to RenJin. Watch the video:

Saturday, May 17, 2008

17th May Football Highlights

enter code : GQIII.Y2J

Players: RenJin; Ariff; Farhan Yazid; Nash; HongQin; Qing Huang; Guo Qiang

click HERE to see more of today's videos.
or just go to ericcantona021 youtube profile to see.

Ming dishonored his word and didn't come for the football which left us in dilema because we had then only 7 players. Lucky for us, the Viera Team came and Qing Huang managed to score a lucky goal against them.

What was Ariff aka Bob doing?? Was he expecting someone to swoop in and *toot* him??! That was definitely an obscene pose!!! Stay away from Ariff!!!

Ariff showed us he can be a great keeper for us sometimes, but this video doesn't quite exactly prove that. Its pretty funny how he rolled his legs after conceding that goal..

Friday, May 16, 2008

EPL Celebrations - 2E4 Decides #3

Best Actor/Clown 2008 Nominee : Nani (Man Utd)
click HERE to see Nani's shameful red card against West Ham.

This is really shameful. During that West Ham game, Nani confronted Neill and headbutted him. After that, watch Nani brilliantly acted like he got stung in his face and collapsed onto the ground! Nani is a really bad human being, something is wrong about his character and personality. Even HongQin and Farhan Yazid don't like him.

Best Actor/Clown 2008 Nominee : C.Ronaldo (Man Utd)
click HERE to watch Ronaldo's world class dive.

Notice that each time Ronaldo goes to ground, he will look seducingly at the referee and cry and complain that he was fouled. Not to forget that he is the Premiership's 'Dive Master'. He is excellent with the dribbles and the stepovers, and apparently also good at acting.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Can You FIFA? - 2E4 Style (Week 2)

Qing Huang 'RockMan'
18 Years Old
RightBack

Rock solid in defence and well adapt in long shots.
The first in the team to have an official girlfriend.

If you are personally trained by GQIII.Y2J, your defending is always superb, and that is how good Qing Huang's defending abilities are. Who want to take part in my defending lessons?? Samuel you want?? RenJin?

Qing Huang is also a very good goalkeeper, despite being the 4th choice goalkeeper in the team. He will be going to 'camp' with his girlfriend during the June Holidays :)

Rate the FIFA Qing Huang from 1-10.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

EPL Celebrations - 2E4 Decides #2

Best Actor/Clown 2008 Nominee : Didier Drogba (Chelsea)
click HERE to see the 'Funny Lehmann & Drogba SchoolKids Shoving'.

No doubt Drogba is an ace striker in the premierleague, he is also the 'Dive Master' of the premierleague. Famously known for hysterically falling down clutching his legs and rolling around as if someone just dropped a nuclear bomb on him. Even top hollywood actor Brad Pitt lose out on acting to Drogba.

Best Actor/Clown 2008 Nominee : William Gallas (Arsenal)
click HERE to see Gallas's Meltdown.

Imagine you concede a penalty at the last minute and your captain walks away, ready to enter the tunnel. And when the opponent scored the equalising penalty kick, your captain lashes out and kicked the advert board. If you have a captain who behaves like an angry schoolkid, you might as well switch clubs, just like what Flamini did. Fuck You Flamini!!

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Fantasy Premier League

Champions: Mr.Suhaili Ramliee
Runner Up: Sir. Samuel
2nd Runner Up: Mr. Nashh
3rd Runner Up: Mr. Hong Qin (Biological Brother of Another Colour)
UEFA Spot: Mr. Nash's Brother
Relegated: Mr(s) Farhan D & Y. Mr. Ming

Top Gameweek Scorer: Sir Samuel. 67 points.

Interview with Sir Sam:

Reporter: So how do you feel about getting 2nd Spot for the 2nd time?
Sir Sam: Mix feelings. I feel disappointed for not getting the Championship for the first time. On the other hand, getting 2nd spot is not bad considering the sluggish start to my season.
Reporter: What made you shoot up the table so high during mid season?
Sir Sam: Oh. I analysed the players in actions on TV and decided who's best for which fixtures. And also, thanks to the brilliance form of C.Ronaldo. I made him the captain for quite a few occasions.
Reporter: Do you think you can win the title for the first time next season?
Sir Sam: Let's see.
Reporter: Thanks for your time, I shall now look for Mr.____ for his views. Back to you, Joe.

Monday, May 12, 2008

EPL Celebrations - 2E4 Decides #1

Best Actor/Clown 2008 Nominee : Ryan Babel (Liverpool)
click HERE to see Ryan Babel 'dive'.

Babel sure has a potential to be the most feared winger in the EPL but his diving reputation is rapidly growing too. He tried to dive to get a penalty during Liverpool's loss to Chelsea in the UEFA Champions League and there were huge amount of controversies surrounding his dive/fall which led to Arsenal's UEFA Champs League exit.

Best Actor/Clown 2008 Nominee : Michael Brown (Wigan)

Just only yesterday when he played against Manchester United, Brown clearly pushed Vidic to the ground and he immediately fell down hysterically and clutched his chin! Brown already has a reputation for tackling illegally with two-footed challenges.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

EPL Celebrations - 2E4 Decides

ESPN/StarSports have their own 'Asia Decides', so the 2E4Team will have our own EPL Celebrations too. But its going to be a little different.

We will have only one award category and it's not going to be the same as ESPN/StarSports.

This award is - "Best Actor/Clown Award 2008".

Over the next couple of days, there will be regular featured posts about the 6 nominations explaining their entry into this fame award. There is a poll for you guys to vote and at the end of the week, the results for the award will be released.

It would be best if you wait and read all the featured posts about the nominees first before voting. However, it is not compulsory.

The 6 nominees are:

Didier Drogba (Chelsea)
Ryan Babel (Liverpool)
Michael Brown (Wigan)
Cristiano Ronaldo (Manchester Utd)
William Gallas (Arsenal)
Nani (Manchester United)

Friday, May 9, 2008

Can You FIFA? - 2E4 Style (Week 1)

Name : Nash
Age : 18
Position : Left Midfield

Nash's ball control and dribbling is certainly one of the best in the team. He can whizz past you like a breeze! Only Guo Qiang can stop him..

I don't know what anticipation means so what the heck! Nash isn't fast, but he ain't slow. He is lacking some aggression dude! Get angry!! If you can't see the blurry text, then enlarge it by clicking the picture.

Nash's goalkeeping is so bad.. He can even let a 2 year old kid kick the ball past him!!

The Nashezar Chavasse can certainly do some great amount of damage from long range with his lethal left foot.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

Can You FIFA? - 2E4 Style

enter code : GQIII.Y2J

Just like the FIFA08, Im going to do something of the same over the next couple of weeks.

Each week will feature one 2E4Team player. You will never know when you are going to be featured..

Watch this space this week!!

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Hilarious Football Quotes

enter code : GQIII.Y2J

Reporter: "Did Michael Essien faint?"
Avram Grant: "He had some problems, but he is ok."
Reporter: "Michael Ballack?"
Grant: "Ask the doctor."

Arsene Wenger: "I cried in my pillow and couldn't sleep last night."
(when asked about Mourinho not shaking his hand after a match.)

Reporter: "Gordon, Do you think James Beattie deserves to be in the England squad?"
Gordon Strachan: "I don't care, I'm Scottish."

Rafa Benitez: "If Chelsea are naive and pure then I'm Little Red Riding Hood."
(Rafa talks nonsense with Jose Mourinho.)

Reporter: "You've got some scars in your face, Zlatan. What has happened?"
Zlatan Ibrahimovich: "Well.. I don´t know.. You'll have to ask your wife about that."

Celtic's Manager and Joker - Gordon Strachan

Gordon Strachan: "It's an incredible rise to stardom. At 17 you're more likely to get a call from Michael Jackson than Sven Goran Eriksson."
(when Sven Goran Eriksson was still England manager.)

Reporter: "So, Gordon, in what areas do you think Middlesbrough were better than you today?"
Gordon Strachan: "What areas? Mainly that big green one out there.."

Reporter: "Is your playing style Swedish or Yugoslavian?"
Zlatan Ibrahimovich: "It's Zlatan-style."

Jose Mourinho: "Look at my haircut. I am ready for the war."
(unveiling his new Action Man haircut.)

Monday, May 5, 2008

One more game to go to decide who is the Champion, who gets relegated, who gets the 5th Spot in our 8 months long Ham N Cheese Ligue.

Football Focus with The Sam

Champions Decider

The top 4 place, like in England, has been dominated by four members. They are Suhaili, Samuel, Nash and Duffers. Anything can happen next Sunday. Duffers may snatch it away or Suhaili may just hang on tight. Who's 2nd and 4th is simply unpredictable. Even Singapore Pools can't produce the odds...

Relegation Battle

Needless to say, Kane and Farhan Yazid are relegated. See you next season. Meanwhile Ren Jin, Daud, Ariff and Nistelrooy will be fighting for their lives to stay up. Mind the managers don't get the pink slip on Monday...

5th Spot Fight

Iskandar, Guo Qiang and Vimallan took the top 4 positions in the early part of the season. However, due to some Club problems, they are now fighting for the 5th Spot. Go, Go, Go!

Thursday, May 1, 2008

1st May Football Report

enter code: GQIII.Y2J

There was a new team who came to challenge us today, despite one very unlucky loss, we bounced back and trounce their sorry asses with 5 wins against them!!

Congrats to Nash who finally broke the 10 goal barrier! He scored 10 goals today! Take that Vimal, Farhan Yazid and Samuel..!!

Here's a short video clip of Ariff's great save:

Today's post will be short and sweet, 'cos I've got too many photos today! Can't squeeze all of the photos here. All thanks to our new cameraman Qing Huang.

View From Behind The GoalPost.

Salsa Hot Nashievro CatWalk. Woooo!! Pretty!!

Camera On The Ground View. Nash With The Ball.

Im Sorry, Aunties And Ah Mahs, Qing Huang's Taken.

Michael Jackson Hits The Court! Aaaaaooohhh!!

Your Inspirational Captain of Excellence

Sorry folks, there were simply too many photos, I shall try to upload the rest in the Photo Gallery.

Players: Ariff, Nash, RenJin, Ming, HongQin, Farhan Yazid, Samuel, Qing Huang, Guo Qiang